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A Poem by Mary
Small
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The Last Class
Someone said, go take the test
Be an officer, be your very best
I took the exam and I did pass
Off to OCS but would I last?
Drove to Lackland with Marlene and Les
Met at the Green Monster with all the rest
An upper classman, so nice and polite
Kindly drove us to the OCS site.
All was calm til we crossed the road
When our upper classman switched to mean mode
He began to shout for us to hurry
After that all was blurry
“Two minutes to take off your stripes
And fall out downstairs and no more gripes
You’re as sorry a bunch as I have ever seen.”
Shouted our upperclassman, now “Mr. Mean”
“Your uniform is a mess, your shoes need a shine
Your hair is too long and your ass is mine
What makes you think an officer you’ll make
I’ll make you regret every breath you take
I need a leader, if there is one to be had,
To step out front before I get mad.
Step back Miss Hauser, you know the ropes.
I want to see one of these other dopes.
Ah Miss Small so you think you can lead,
Let’s see if you can do the deed.
March these maggots down the road to chow
Let’s see if you really know how.”
Needless to say I was not up to the task
Improper commands were made by me, alas
Another poor slob was called to the fore
And then another, ‘til there were no more.
But before forever, by hit and by miss
We got the commands right and all was bliss,
“Road guards out, post right and left, Post!
Forward march!” We could smell the roast.
But not so fast, this was only the start
We soon found we knew nothing or only a part
Our upper class did not care how hard we tried
Nothing we did would keep them satisfied
They swarmed about like birds of prey
Shouting and insulting us along the way
Right or wrong, it did not matter
It was our confidence they sought to shatter
We couldn’t eat dinner like normal folk
We had to ask permission before we spoke
We squared our meals and chewed ? times
We tried to eat while they played with our minds
We memorized silly things to say
To try to make our superiors day
We made Very Important dining room announcements
When we wanted to make very profound pronouncements
We sang like 500 pound canaries and tap danced too,
Both were things we never thought we could do
We could yell at our upper class at the top of our voices
But Yes Sir and No Excuse Sir were our only choices
We studied all night beneath the sheets
Staying awake and alert were major feats
We dinged our classmates in our Peer Reports
Although cooperate and graduate was our goal of sorts
Our upperclassmen had not one job but two
Making us miserable and unhappy as only they could do
In these two tasks they took great delight
Harassing and humiliating us both day and night
We, the last class, were deprived of this pleasure
We had no underclass of which to take measure
So we picked on each other as best we could
With lots of practice some of us got quite good
Ah such memories that we all had
Some were good and some were bad
We longed for the day when we would be free
21 June 1963
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